The raw truth based off my observations and experiences.
How can you live in America and not be a social justice activist by default?
I often wonder how after 28 months home from doing 19 ½ years in prison, how I’m an activist. Am I qualified to sit on the national committee for the Millions for Prisons Human Rights March? Should I have stepped into a membership position with the Close Rikers campaign? Would it have been better if I kept my head down and just got myself together for the next 3-5 years? Especially since 3yrs seems to be some magical number that stats say 67 % of people who are released from prison reoffends within that timeframe.
I had to take a long hard look at myself, meditate, and clear my mind to the point where no thoughts exist. The Daoist masters call this state the “No Mind”. When I am at my calmest state, I am the most dangerous. I see everything as a mathematical process. The clarity I gain after meditation is the greatest resource I will ever have.
Sometimes I ask myself…am I human? And why the things that most people fear when it comes to the so-called establishment I don’t? Then it becomes clear… it is the love I have for myself. I want for myself what I want for my brothers and sisters. When I was imprisoned I fought and filed two legal cases on behalf of the 5% Nation of Gods and Earths (NGE). My adversary chose to label the NGE an STG (Security Threat Group) at first, and then a gang. That means I went from some type of terrorist threat to a gang member. This is the moment I became an activist. This issue affected me and thousands of others; I was an NGE activist.
I learned a valuable lesson in the power dynamic of the haves and have-nots. I could have said “fuck it” did my time and maybe made parole earlier than the 11th time I went up. But what type of man would I have been?
I did not seek out or even know the two issues I am involved with had organizations that dealt with it. When I was asked to play a part in the movement, I knew intrinsically what I was supposed to do. I accepted the challenge when I could have made the excuse “my money not right” or “I am working on securing a solid foundation for myself”. If I had done that then what type of man would I have been?
Glenn Martin from the “JustLeadership” organization has a saying, “Those close to the problem are closest to the solution.” I concur. I realized I have the empirical experience and insight to address the issues I am involved in. Too often we shrink from our responsibilities as community stakeholders. We take the position:
The only question is…why are you not involved?
Guerrilla Thinking and Urban Refinement
The main thing about incarceration is you are going to have to make a choice. Are you going to remain the same and study street philosophy and so-call learn a better way to do the same thing or a new hustle from an old fool, who life consist of touring prisons? Or will you be courageous and transform your pre-incarcerated thinking to be the best you? But if you are not dissatisfied in being a half-dead commodity and living with the quasi-dead, as well as being ruled over by mental midgets then you probably are a zombie.
The catalyst for transformation for me started when the judge slammed that gravel at the conclusion of my guilty verdict. I thought to myself, this is what I get for following the codes of the street and being a stand-up dude.
I guess I should have been happy because I was facing life plus 28 years. Reporting this to my father, who already heard, was one of the lowest points in my life. No son should hear that level of hurt transmitted in his father’s voice. I didn’t even use my whole click.I went to my bunk and wrapped up in a sheet forming a cocoon. Why? For I could cry in peace and go to sleep letting the tears wash another layer of who I thought was me away.
When I awaken I began to question all the ideas and values I was taught in the streets. I would come to learn two powerful key terms and use them like surgical scalpels. They were introspection and retrospection. I realize that I had to fully emerge myself in a soul searching mission. This is when my self-discovery truly began. The transformation of the criminal mentality to one of Righteousness. When I talk about righteousness I am not coming from a religious perspective, but one of self-evaluation, self-mastery, and in tune with Universal Law and Divine Order. The inherent divine compass that exists with inside of you.
As I became a big brother to those around me, I understood that I had to reflect a model of manhood other than what was expected from being a convict. It is easy to surrender to your lower reptilian brain. But to be a progressive thinker and practice behavioral refinement and adjustment is a challenge. Why? The prison atmosphere, convict mentality of others, and poor character C.O.s (and administration(s)); all summon you to surrender to the animal. You have to exercise supreme discipline or you will become reactionary and a slave to other people’s movement. I had to swallow things that offended my false pride. I never mastered it but became a savant of managing it.
When you wake out of your illusionary state of being a ‘real nigga’ you become political to what’s happening around you. You know from your first day in prison that it is no such thing as rehabilitation. As you develop your knowledge through studying, you understand the why. At some point, you will ask yourself, how do I break pass the limited expectation of those who benefit from my situation politically or/and economically.
I will not say that you can practice complete righteousness in a diabolic atmosphere. One time I was faced with a decision to kill another prisoner, because of an act of violence he had done to one of my younger brothers and student at that time. I was 29 years old, had been in prison for nine years at this time, and about to turn into a hypocrite in my mother’s eye. It was the calmest choice I had ever made. I let one tear for my mother drop because I resolved in my mind that the next move automatically made me eligible for the death penalty because I was already locked up on a murder charge. The only thing that interfered with my plan is that I didn’t have a banger. So I requested one from the older brothers I rolled with. They weighed the situation, weighed my character, and weighed our bonds, and made a decision that saved me from a possibly hot shot in the arm. I am usually rational but they saw I wasn't because of my bond with the younger brother. They knew I was serious, extremely discipline, and never talked about my former street life with them; only about progressive thoughts and ideas. So they understood if they would have given me that banger, I would have killed that prisoner, doomed myself with death by the state or had gotten natural life in prison. I am still grateful to those brothers (Life and Atl) to this day.
Some may question why I didn’t have a banger. The same reason I hung my guns up before I got locked up in 1995. I made a conscious choice not to. When you know you’ll get busy and meet aggression with equal or more aggression and you are striving to change, you have to eliminate factors in your life. I was navigating a path out the streets at 20 years old. I knew other options was out there. And I didn’t like the person I had become. On a very real level the longer you stay in the streets the more you transform into an animal. I knew in my core that wasn’t me.
One of the hardest things to do is to alter your thinking from your street persona grata to a progressive urban guerrilla thinker. The greatest wars are fought with thoughts and ideas. The first terrain you have to conquer is your own mind. The reason I use guerrilla is my personal nod to intellectual guerrillas like Walter Rodney and George Jackson who represented the same concepts but demonstrated in two different arenas. A guerrilla uses what every resource is available to improve his/her position strategically, knowing they do not have the resources of what their opposition might have. To the powers at be, I am a thought terrorist.
 A timed phone call
There are myriad of issues that plague our community: gentrification, police terrorism, poor schools, self-hate, and others. I want to focus on the prison industrial complex. This monstrosity is feed with bodies and taxpayer dollars.
The prison system as it's currently designed is not structured on “rehabilitation” African-Americans but exploitation. According to the book Slavery by Another Name, after slavery ended in this country to after WWII, Black men were arrested on trumped up charges mainly vagrancy and fined. The local sheriff knowing these out-of-work men could not pay the fines, he subsequently sold them to the local plantation, mills, and mines. A lot of these men died in this prison camps.
In this modern day era, they give prisoners anywhere from a few pennies to a dollar an hour for their labor to work in factories that produce products. These products get sold and make millions but for who? But companies like Jpay, Global Tel-Link, Keefe, and Private Prisons just make money directly off the prisoner and his family through supplying cheap products, high services, or the prisoners themselves become the commodity. It’s a high level of vampirism going on.
Prisoner Human rights abuse from Abu Ghraib Prison made global news, most people never heard of the atrocities at Red Onion Prison in Virginia or the countless others that are peppered across American’s rural areas.
This is why it is imperative that we organize against the prison industrial complex and raised the alarm. Become active and be a part of the Millions for Prisoners Human Rights March on Washington, D.C. August 19, 2017.
Man down! Another youth shot by systematic institutionalizes racism. Rest in Peace little brother Paul O’Neal. The onslaught of Black men, women, and children being played out on the tel-lie-vison is the accumulation of the roots of this country busting through the red, white, and blue.
Has something change or just the fact everybody has a recording device now? So the handful of people who control major media can’t put a whitewash or spin events that make the victim look like the aggressor. We already see without video footage that the media can make an armed adult wannabe cop like George Zimmerman look like the prey against Trayvon Martin, who was a child eating skittles.
But it has always been open season on Niggers. It started when the first African hit the British Colony of Virginia in 1619. When they stripped them of their cultural identity and made them into a beast of burden. They made children and women into bed warmers and men into mindless bucks. Objects! The point is a thing doesn’t get respect. So the African had to be thought of less than a human in order for the founding thieving Christians of this country to morally quiet their religious heart.
Who did the different African cultural groups become? The ethnic Nigger. The thing that needs no respect or has none. It’s the same systematic thinking that barbarians from the Caucus Mountains introduced into melanin strong Indus-Kush under Hinduism. One might make the argument that Hindu caste system is the first form of apartheid and Nigger making.
Look at Black America: slavery, Black Codes, Jim Crow Laws, redlining, police brutality, Nigger culture, self-hatred, and a host of other diabolic shit sanction by the powerbrokers—it’s a miracle Niggers has not gone the same way the aboriginal Tasmanian people did after their contact with those same civilize English speaking people.
Police body cameras and smartphones are recording that the hunt for Niggers is still on. The root cause of it all is the lack of respect for Black Americans that this country produces. Even when immigrant groups come here they get the unwritten memo it’s alright to treat Niggers anyway while they set up economic encampments in our hoods. Or feel they can blatantly disrespect and overlook us.
Black Lives Matters but only to us. When Niggers really start to wake up and understand the historical reality that everything boils down to respect. And your socio-economical level doesn’t matter, having good manners doesn’t matter or bleaching your skin…it doesn’t matter. When Niggers (and Bitches) learn their true value and nobody can give you respect but you make them respect you then All Lives will Matter.
Let there be a wholesale marginalization and institutionalize sanction killers of Anglo-Saxon, Visigoths, Vandals, Celtics, Gauls, Jews or LGBT community…